The BIG Birthday Party

Sometimes kids say interesting things. Sometimes parents believe them, but most of the time we brush it off. While I was trying to teach my four-year-old how to swim a couple of months ago she told me "I will swim when I am five years old!" and refused to have anything more to do with 'learning' how to swim. She has worn a life-jacket in the water for the last year, and is consistently afraid of the water (she does just fine in the life jacket, and we go swimming on average once or more a week). I wasn't going to push the issue, I know pushing can do more harm than good, so I thought "Whatever," and let it drop.

Her birthday landed on the Saturday before the new semester started- a great day to hit the beach with a bunch of friends. We organized the trip and decided to try out a new beach - #1 Beach. It's near Batibou, which remains our undisputed favorite, all though #1 was okay. We played in the waves and had a grand old time once we got to the beach, but before we left the house I had to deal with 'attitude' from my oldest. She didn't want to go to the beach. She wanted to go to the swimming pool. I had all ready arranged for 8 families to go, including providing the transportation for two of them, so I was willing to negotiate with her. I agreed to take her swimming after spending all the morning at the beach. Crazy, I know, but I was hoping she would be too tired-out to hold me to the promise.

Yeah. Right. My children? Tired? What was I thinking?
So, after arriving home, we packed back up, applied more sunscreen, and headed to the swimming pool.
Now, the youngest, all though afraid of the water, had been exposed more often than our average one trip a week through the schools' summer program. The kids had been attending the pool with a life guard 3-4 times a week all through the summer. My daughter decided towards the end that she no longer needed a life-jacket because she was perfectly happy "practicing swimming" (her term) on the stairs of the swimming pool. These stairs are not much different than your average stairs in a pool. Not much larger or smaller, and since she was happy 'pretending to swim' (my term) and in general stayed on the stairs I was okay with the life guard monitoring her every day. Still, we made our weekly trips as a family, and I noticed little (if no) progress in her swimming abilities.
So there we are, at the swimming pool, on her birthday, after spending all morning at an Atlantic Ocean beach with waves too big for her comfort. (She spent most of her time playing in the sand that morning.) We all hop in, and before I realize what's going in, she ducks under the water (I go into mild shock at that point, she would never, NEVER voluntarily put her head under the water) and swims about 4 feet to me. I grab her and say "Wow! You can swim! You just swam to me!" To which she responds simply "I'm five-years-old now."My shock increases. We spend the next hour with her pushing off the steps and swimming to me - under the water! Now I admit, she had finally figured out how to BARELY keep her head above the water with an awkward doggie-paddle the week leading up to her birthday, but seriously, it was like one week she was constantly near-drowning and the next day (her birthday) she could swim.
After the first hour she decided to start jumping off the side of the pool. My child. The one who was terrified of jumping, whether it was straight into Mommy's/Daddy's arms from the wall, or with Mom/Dad holding her and bouncing up and down in the water, or ... whatever! She is terrified of jumping!!!! And yet, here she is, five-years-old, and jumping into the water, not my arms even, and then swimming to me after the jump.
I only wish I had that kind of determination. "I'll ________________ (insert your impossible-to-do task that you would love-to-do but are also afraid-to-do) by my next birthday." And then you do it. No matter how impossible or afraid you are.
Yeah....
What would I do? Finish my degree? Open a business? Trade on the stock-market? Take acting and dance lessons? What would I do?

Well, enough personal reflection. Her birthday party was held the following week. There were several children with birthdays around the same time, and to simplify my friends and I decided to combine our daughters' parties and divide the responsibilities. I got volunteered to do the cake, since my friends had seen the cakes I made for the oldest's birthday in July. She had a rock n' roll theme and these were her cakes.



Now I love baking, and I'm not complaining. I love baking, but especially when I have all the necessary ingredients and tools... which I don't have here. Still, another good friend volunteers to let us borrow her castle form, and since our themes for this party (remember, we combined parties) were princesses and kittys a castle was perfect. I woke up early, knowing I do better if I'm not rushed, and I started baking immediately. The party isn't until 3:00 pm, and I should have plenty of time to bake, cool, and frost the cake(s) and then get everybody ready and out the door by 2:00 so we can decorate. That was the plan.
I had shipped 12 cake mixes to the island last August. One for each month I thought we would be staying on the island. (We do a lot of bake sales, and you never know when you'll be in the mood to make cupcakes.) Cake mix costed $0.88 at Wal-mart, and about $5.50 on the island, so you can see why it was worth shipping. The bad part is that the humidity is so extreme here, it gets to everything. Even if the expiration date says it's good for another 6 months. When I made cakes for my oldest daughter's birthday party in July I had to use twice as many to get the desired effect since the mix didn't rise well.
I was prepared this time. I had spent the exorbitant island price for one mix and had been given another by a friend. She was smart. She kept hers in the freezer.
I decided to marble the two mixes - a strawberry and red velvet castle cake. Perfect. I used about 2/3 of each mix in the form, and poured the extra into two 8 inch rounds. The castle cake came out of the oven perfect. I let it cool on top of the stove while I baked the first round. (My oven is too small to fit two rounds in at the same time.) After that round was done, I popped the second one in, and decided to move the castle in front of the fan. It stays hot - really hot - around the oven, and I knew I would need to do this to cool the cake completely before I tried to put it in the fridge. I begin making one of the old cake mixes to have some cupcakes available. This is big party, and I am in charge of the cake. I want there to be enough for all of the kids who show up.
Enter big sister. Big sister is cranky. Maybe because it's little sister's birthday. Who knows how the moods of a seven-year-old work. Big sister lays down on the couch, and accidentally kicks the cake off the arm where it is cooling in front of the fan. She hears the crash and says tritely "Sorry!" I run. I stare. I fight back tears. The beautiful (yes, the marbling worked REALLY well, and the cake was perfectly moist) cake is completley in pieces. More than 5. I try to put them back in place and they break apart more. I realize there is NO saving this cake. I berate my oldest for not paying attention and send her to her room in tears. My husband breaks away from his computer, recognizing that something in the home has changed (it might be my anger and frustration emanating in waves from wall to wall). He suggests "Pour pudding on top of it and call it 'Strawberry Delight'." My brilliant husband. Unfortunatley I have 3 pudding boxes left. Butterscotch. Pistachio. Maybe lemon could work?
Enter new neighbor who just needs to let her daughter get a little distracted by my highly active girls (regular, welcome habit, I also reflect that it might have been inspired this particular occasion). I had all ready apologized to the oldest for making her cry at this point. I knew it was an accident. As the children start playing I explain my distress. My new neighbor says "I have vanilla pudding. More than I will use. Would you like some?" Yay! Strawberry Delight is officially on the birthday menu.
The cupcakes get done. They are not as flat as I thought they would be, but they aren't quite perfect either. I pull down an extra strawberry cake mix. Since I had only made one batch of cupcakes, I still had 1/2 the batter. I add the new cake mix, wash the dishes, and pour a new castle cake. It bakes while I frantically begin working on frosting.
Have you ever tried making frosting in 86 degree weather with substantial humidity? According to the heat index it is more like 105 degrees. Frosting melts. I try harder. It's 2:00 and the castle cake is done and cool but not frosted. The round cake is done and frosted but not decorated. I screw up trying to decorate it, and decide to try again. I scrape all the frosting off, and then turn the cake upside-down, and start over. 2:30. Will the cake-tastrophe ever end? The colors are done, I'm starting to frost the castle, and 5 kids show up. "You were supposed to go straight to the pool!" I try not to sound accusing or unwelcoming despite my exasperation. "Mommy told us we couldn't, that we had to go with you." I look at my husband. He says "I'll take the kids. You finish the cake and come when you are ready." There is a reason I bought that fridge magnet that says "I'm married to an angel."
I frost like a mad woman. I make stupid mistakes that I know how to prevent, but am in too big of a hurry to bother with. I rush and stress and rush. I finish! I realize I don't have my phone to call a taxi. I can't transport 12 cups of strawberry delight, 12 cupcakes, a round cake and a castle cake without a taxi. I use the computer to call one. The driver totally respects my hours of labor and drives as slow as he possibly can to prevent cake and frosting from ending up all over the cab. I show up half an hour late to my daughters party.... but I brought plenty of cake.



Happy Birthday my darling!

Nana and Papa Fisher come to visit!!!!

Yay! The last week of August my husband's parents came to visit. They brought my fixed laptop back, my new camera, new toys and swimsuits and clothes for the girls, and even if they hadn't brought a single thing with them, their visit alone would have pulled me out of my depression! We were so excited to have them come and see our little corner of paradise, and so were they. Since we couldn't afford to go home the whole time we were on the island, we hadn't seen either of our parents in over a year. It was wonderful to see them again.

I drove to pick them up at the airport (one of the more difficult drives on the island) and just was so excited the whole way there. Then I pulled up and saw Mom standing on the curb and instead of being overjoyed I started crying because it suddenly hit me just how long it has been since we had seen them.
I had mapped out a whole variety of activities both adventurous and relaxing for us to do with our company in town, and boy, was it a lot of fun.

We started off with a party for all of my sweetie's study partners. We planned the dinner party for 5:00, and as I reflected on this plan during the week I realized my schedule would be really hectic that afternoon - I wouldn't return from picking up my in-laws at the airport until 4:30! So, I decided on a meal I could prepare, but not cook until the last minute. Something a little different, you know, interesting, and with a little bit for everyone to enjoy. Why not pizza? I started buying the ingredients I would need a week in advance. Then my wonderful girlfriends decided they would go on a SCUBA diving trip, something we've been talking about doing for over a semester, and finally we were actually doing it but--- the big event was the morning my in-laws were arriving. I decided that if I could have the house totally clean and the pizzas all ready to throw together and pop in the oven I could just make the schedule work and enjoy the Cabrits sponsored dive. I am so glad I had the opportunity to go on that trip, and will remember my diving girls forever! (Love you sweeties!)

I ended up making 6 different pizzas - 1/2 cheese 1/2 pepporoni for the kids, pampered chef fresh garden style, hawaiian, supreme, meat lovers, and barbecue chicken. Making 6 crusts the day before worked perfectly along with all of my advanced preparation, and I think the party was a hit. The boys finished it off by heading down to the beach for a 'packet burning' - all the notes they didn't want to keep, which they somehow managed to burn despite all the rain.

The next day we were off to Roseau. We decided to rent a car since our sedan is kind of low to the ground and you really need some clearance for some of the sites we were going to. We started with Champagne Bay, did some souvenir shopping, and then checked in to the Fort Young Hotel. I did end up getting my waterproof digital camera (an Olympus Stylus 1030 SW), which Nana and Papa brought to the island for me, and so I had a lot of fun trying it out while we snorkeled, all though I quickly realized that the charge the battery came with was not sufficient (duh, I all ready knew that!) and worse that my spare battery and charger had been left at home! We saw the biggest school of squid I've seen to date, and my oldest daughter had a blast showing off for Nana and Papa as she independently explored the sea-life, never-ending bubbles, etc.






We ate lunch at the Cornerhouse Cafe, located down the road from Astaphan's and up the road from Jolly's Pharmacy. The Cafe is on the 2nd floor of the building, you have to take the stairs on the side in the alley to enter the restaurant. Caribbean dishes with a few familiar items make this restaurant a favorite lunch spot for Ross Spouses Organization shopping trips.

The Fort Young Hotel may have been an expensive indulgence, but it really made us feel like we were on vacation too. We reserved ocean-view deluxe rooms and thoroughly enjoyed the deck, furnishings, and especially the bath tub. It was big enough for the girls to have water up to their necks! We don't have bath tubs, only showers, so this was a really nice feature. I had really wanted to go swimming in their infinity pool (the only one on the island) but the rain interrupted. We ate at the hotel's restaurant that night. I don't recall much of the dinner, but it reminded me somewhat of our trip to the all-inclusive resort in St. Lucia. The service was slower, but enjoying it with family more than made up for that.







At this point I decided to run home first thing in the morning to retrieve my battery and charger for my new awesome camera - which I never would have bought if I hadn't been planning on using it for the days activities! I left the hotel at 5 and was back by 7, just in time for breakfast.

We kind of split up and ate breakfast at Rituals (our favorite American like 'restaurant' (it's really a coffee shop)) and CocoRico's (a little French Cafe right next door to Rituals that has nice crepes). Then we were off for our busiest day of the vacation.



The first stop was Trafalgar Falls, one of the most visited sites on the island. The twin falls can be viewed from an overlook that is about a 10 - 15 minute hike.







We normally go further, since there is a little natural hot spring you can soak in just beyond the overlook, but our next stop was Screw's Sulphur Spa which features like 7 hot springs, so I battled the rest of my family to hold off on the soak until we got to Screw's (named after the owner people). That was probably our only little bit of dissension through the whole vacation, and Nana and Papa seemed to be ok with my agenda, even if my husband and daughters were slightly miffed with me. That only lasted about half an hour though, since as soon as we were all comfortably soaking in the multiple springs at Screw's all was forgiven. We had a blast playing in the hot-tub temperature mineral-rich water.







Lunch was served at Papillote, a quaint little rainforest bed and breakfast which all though I had passed on the way to the waterfalls, I somehow missed twice as we drove around the other side of the valley. While Papillote is one of my favorite restaurants, the picky eaters among us had to make do with what we could get. The girls ended up with pancakes from the breakfast menu (I considered it lucky they would make a breakfast item for lunch!). The tropical gardens are a great source of pleasure to me, and I took a few pictures of some of the flora.






Our next stop was TiTou Gorge. Now I know that I blogged about this site a mere two entries ago, but this time I had a digital waterproof camera with me! The gorge was a little too scary for claustrophobic Nana, but the rest of us climbed in, adjusted to the cold, and started up the gorge. When we got to the alcove - the resting spot at the end - my youngest daughter saw a crab... and totally FREAKED OUT! We see crabs all the time, and have even caught a few. I still don't get why it scared her so bad. She was absolutely hysterical, so I had no choice but to abandon my husband and Papa and get her out in the open so she could calm down. She was so freaked out that she kept standing on top of me while I was swimming with her, and she was totally like a leach around my neck. Even with her life jacket, she was pushing me under as I was desperately trying to get out. I think maybe if I hadn't had so little sleep and been so all ready sleep deprived from the mad days of preparation that I would have had more strength, but as it was, I barely made it. I was very grateful that the boys had my camera and got some great shots on their way out.







From the gorge I decided that we could barely make it to Emerald Pool before sun-down, which we barely did. The ranger and almost all of the tourists had all ready left when we pulled into the parking area, and though we were tired we trekked the 15-20 minutes through the rainforest just in time to get a few shots in the remaining sunlight. The girls jumped in, but since it had been intermittenly raining all day the adults were all chilled enough to pass on the cool dip in the waterfall's pool.




We ate dinner at the Sunset Bay restaurant (which is also a quaint little dive hotel). Sunset's is a Ross student favorite even if it is a 25 minute drive from campus, and they offer one of the best variety of menu selections around. We've never been disappointed in our food, and this night was no exception, all though it was the worst service I've ever had from them. I wonder if the waitress was just having a bad night since we've had her before and not had such problems. The chocolate mousse was divine!

Our next several days were spent relaxing, going to church, going to the swimming pool, etc. We also made a trip to the historic Fort Shirley where I discovered the panorama feature on my new camera...




And then a special horse-back riding lesson for Nana and my oldest, and a special dive for Papa and me. Daddy stayed home to study for the nasty comp exam that is coming up so soon.... and he generously kept the little one home to allow everyone else to participate in their respective adventures. We had so much fun! I learned a lot about my diving expert father-in-law and Nana was flattered with a compliment on her natural balance on a horse.



Before we knew it, their trip was coming to a close, and it seemed like it had hardly even started. It all ready seems like a wonderful, splendid dream, and I look forward to our next grand adventure which will occur in November when my parents come... and then the girls and I will go home with them.


We (the students and their spouses) have a tendency to complain about so many aspects of life on Dominica, but truthfully, the island is a beautiful place, filled with kind and beautiful people. The longer I reside here, the more I believe that our perspective is seriously hampered by the abundant stresses of medical school. Yes, there are drawbacks that are typical of life on any island, and yes there are drawbacks of the 'developing nation' nature, but the lessons we have learned, the adventures we have gone on, the challenges overcome, the natural beauty, the opportunity for increased understanding and personal growth, far outweigh those oh-so-frustrating drawbacks.

And that doesn't even take into account the people!!! I love the Dominicans, and love it when they tell me my daughters are truly Dominican now, and that I am by heart. Their culture is so rich I still have many aspects that I will not fully understand or even grasp before we leave, and their generosity and kindness and spirit will change my personal perspective for the rest of my life.




Add to that the precious opportunity to be surrounded by people (the students and their families and the professors) who are so similar to us in their interests and goals and motivations, to be in the same torturous, life-changing situation with those people (med-school in a foreign country), and maybe you can glimpse how very wonderful, unique, and truly special this island is.